Dragging Myself Kicking and Screaming

I hate Mondays.

I hate Tuesdays too.

And Wednesdays.

Oh, and Thursdays.

Fridays, I'm not in love (please tell me you got 'The Cure' reference).

Saturdays and Sundays I'm not particularly a fan of either.

Well, gosh. Would you look at that? Anything that ends in "-day" is not my friend. Kind of makes life a little hard, doesn't it?

Basically, I'm dragging myself kicking and screaming through life. Every. Day.

Sometimes it is internal kicking and screaming. And sometimes (I am somewhat ashamed to admit) it is less so. Sorry family!

But I guess I’m sorta kinda proud of myself for at least dragging through life. While it certainly is not ideal, and I would much rather be casually strolling and enjoying the scenery instead, I have to believe that I am moving one step closer every day to becoming somebody who I actually want to be. Some days feel like big steps forward (or more like inelegant leaping kicks minus a few screams), and others feel like a hundred steps backwards with those same leaping kicks becoming flying ones to the face. And the gut. *insert the infamous 'Karate Kid' crane kick - except I'm Johnny Lawrence instead of Daniel LaRusso*

I wish I wasn’t having to drag myself kicking and screaming through life. In fact, I hate it, to be completely honest. I’m mad at myself, and I’m mad at the people that impacted my life to the point where I’m feeling this way. I’m hoping there is some righteous anger in the mix to represent the injustice of what has happened in my life, but it’s hard to sort through it when I have such a jumble of emotions tumbling through me on a regular basis.

Ugh. Life really just sucks sometimes. And sometimes ‘sometimes’ means every day. But I guess that’s ok. I’m not perfect, and neither are you. Whether it be external circumstances, internal ones that we inflict upon ourselves, or neither of those and life just feels too hard, you’re not alone. Cliché, I know. Because I know I’ve most definitely felt alone when I *know* that I’m not. We humans are funny creatures though, and our brains do strange things when we’re stressed and depressed (maybe that should become my new catch cry - stressed & depressed - it’s got a nice ring to it). And we can’t forget that the devil is a big fat liar who loves to mess with us and kick us when we’re down (cause gee, I don’t do enough of that to myself already).

So, while I attempt to proudly drag myself kicking and screaming through life, I’m going to make sure that Satan gets his turn copping some of those kicks to the face and enough screams that he goes deaf. Because he doesn’t deserve to hear my shout of joy when I stop dragging and start dancing. That’s reserved for my Saviour Jesus, who let’s be honest, is going to deliver the best ever KO sucker punch to the enemy once and for all. And oh boy, I can’t wait.

#honestlyimperfect #stressedanddepressed